Doubly So If You Are Practically Bedridden Due To Cramps

You learn a lot about a person after spending a weekend in bed with them.

Especially In The Wee Hours Of The Night When All You Want To Do Is Sleep

Perhaps it is only me, but the memory of vomiting never quite encompasses the truly horrid nature of the actual experience.

Feverdogs

Upon being awakened from a semi-restful nap by the sound of my dogs playing loudly, I in turn, loudly inquired if they could possibly decrease the noise level of their fun, only to be surprised and distressed when virtually no sound exited my mouth.

Better Late Than Never

I think that I have finally experienced the mystique of the seasonal allergy.

The Double Guessing Of My Intentions

My boss' puppy has a malignant tumor and I'm afraid that every time I try to offer my condolences or support she might view it as a new employee just trying to make a good impression.

Imagine How The Grandparents In Willy Wonka Felt

You learn a lot about a person after laying on a couch with them for a week.

Snuggle With Me, My Immune Buddy

I'm so happy that my dogs cannot catch the flu.

Existentialism On The Brink

You know you're running a high fever when you cannot be certain what is dream and what is reality.

Pick Your Reading Materials Carefully

Gene Wilder comes to me in a dream, surrounded by produce, and filled with questions for me about his auto-biography.

Beyond My Control

Physical weakness has always frightened me in ways that mental weakness has not - my body is inlaid with time bombs in the guise of malformed genes.

Lamentations Of A Sickie

Human bodies are far too fragile; you raise their core temperature five degrees and their brains begin to cook.

The Ovaries Can Stay

Damn my uterus; damn it to hell!

Sickness Be Damned

After almost a week of sleeping every available moment, I think that I've finally filled my reserves.

Conundrum

What should you do when you are too sick to sleep at night but then by mid-morning you are too well to go to the doctor?

Forever Gone Is The Idealized Mother Of My Childhood

The more I work on this post, wording and rewording the same thoughts over and over again, the more I come to realize that it all boils down to this: after my experience in Virginia, I will never look at my mother the same way again.

Next Time Has To Be An Improvement

I would be the one to travel hundreds of miles from home, towards a potentially awesome week of amusement park fun, only to get dreadfully sick for virtually the entire length of my stay.

You're Always On My Mind

After realizing that if I had taken the medicine prescribed for my migraines with the medicine prescribed for my craziness I could have died from internal bleeding, I lost the rest of my already meager amount of trust in the medical professionals in my life.

Modern Day Icarus

Last night I dreamt that I could fly but I got cancer from being too close to the power lines.

A Legitimate Excuse

I cannot help but feel that calling into work when you are actually sick is a waste of an opportunity to escape the doldrums of a normal working day and experience something new.

American Priorities

I cannot understand why America, one of the richest countries in the world, cannot afford to take care of the medical needs of its people.